Eight Reasons
by brickroad16
Summary: Eight reasons Sarah Walker loves Chuck Bartowski.


Title: Eight Reasons

Summary: Eight reasons Sarah Walker loves Chuck Bartowski.

Author's note: Thanks to SoContagious for letting me know that anonymous reviews were disabled.

Disclaimer: I don't own _Chuck_.

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1. His nerd herder uniform

She likes it because it suits him, very well. It's the fashion equivalent of his character. Nerdy, safe, exactly the kind of guy you want to bring home to your family. It's nice, presentable, though not exceptionally handsome. But beyond that, she likes it because of the little touches he gives it. The pocket protector and the pens. His nametag.

The one reason she will never let slip, though, is that it gives her an excuse to touch him. When he's wearing it, she can straighten his tie, smooth his shirt, even push back a stray curl (though that's a bit of a stretch). And when a faint flush suffuses her cheeks because of accidental skin-on-skin contact, she can always blame it on the slightly disheveled uniform.

2. His brown eyes

Since she started dating in high school, all of her boyfriends have had blue eyes. She never realized it until lately, when she was staring at Chuck (unintentionally, of course) and became intensely aware that his eyes were a startling shade of brown. She likes to think that it signals a change in her taste in men. After all, most of her previous boyfriends were jerks once she got to know them, even Bryce to a certain extent. And though she tries her hardest to fight the pull of those eyes, each time she looks in them, she feels a part of her resolve soften.

3. His stability

Since she joined the agency, she hasn't had time for a settled life, always bouncing from this city to that. It's part of the reason she was attracted to this job. She's adventurous, and experiencing a new place for the first time, especially in a high-danger situation, is an intense rush. Just when she starts to feel that she's been in L.A. for too long, Ellie invites her over for dinner and she finds new reasons to stay. Watching the gang crowded around the table, enjoying their self-made family, she's happy, truly happy for the first time in a long time. This is what she gave up, a stable life with her parents and siblings. If she had never joined the agency, she might have been married by now, with kids of her own maybe. Sometimes when she looks at him, she wants to melt into this life with him. And she knows that he's more than willing to make it her family, too.

4. The way she has to stand on her tiptoes to kiss him

Okay, so she's not supposed to be kissing him at all, and they only kissed once, but she liked having to stand on her tiptoes to reach his lips, even pulling on his shirt to steady herself. It was a dizzying experience, one that still makes her reel even as she recalls it.

She's tall. She towers over most of the people she meets, even most of the guys. But not Chuck. She knows being tall is not something he can help, but she feels . . . evenly matched standing next to him. They're so different in every other aspect that being similar in height is reassuring. And some nights, when she's lying in bed and can't sleep, she wonders what it'd be like to have his lanky body stretched out next to hers.

5. The way he makes her feel wanted

She's glad that thoughts of Bryce have almost dissipated from her mind. The only times she thinks of him now is when she finds herself comparing him to Chuck, and those comparisons usually come out in Chuck's favor. Her relationship with Bryce had been one of convenience. They were in a high-stress job and needed release. It's much different with Chuck. She's there because he needs to be protected, but she stays because he wants her to. He doesn't have to invite her over to play video games, but he enjoys her company. And though she's not supposed to get attached to this job, she always accepts for the same reason.

6. The way he is unguarded

Even when she is just hanging out with Chuck and his friends – can she say _"their_ friends" yet? – she pauses before she speaks, runs every sentence through her brain before it crosses her lips. Because one slip up could get her pulled from this operation. Right now, she doesn't think she can handle that. Chuck's friendship is the one constant in her life, the thing that keeps her from going crazy. And since one mistake can take that away from her, she guards everything she says and does.

He gazes at her closely, when he thinks she's unaware, and she can tell that he suspects how much she's hiding behind her walls. He gets this miserable look like he's lost all hope of ever breaking through those barriers. Her heart plummets at the sight, because she wishes she could share his openness. Wishes she could tell him all about her childhood, all about her awkward teenage years, all about her faults and defects and imperfections. About how she loves board games and train rides and the smell of cinnamon. How she hates itchy sweaters and asparagus and not knowing what kind of music she likes.

Someday, he'll stop trying to break through her walls, and realize that the best course of action is to climb right over them.

7. The way he makes her feel normal

She was informed when she was recruited into the agency of what she would have to sacrifice. She left her family, and hadn't spoken to her parents or younger sister in almost six years. She's never stayed in one place long enough to make any friends, and even if she had, she would have had to leave them once the mission was over.

But when she's with Chuck, she forgets that she knows 76 ways to kill a man with her bare hands, forgets that she's been missing her young adulthood because she's been jetting all over the world in order to dispose of international murderers and criminals or to gather intelligence that can prevent a world-wide nuclear war. Sitting on Chuck's – or rather Ellie's – couch sipping a cold can of Coke, she has no trouble pretending she's a normal twenty-something who works a dead-end job and derives most of her happiness from hanging out with her friends. Her favorite nights are nights like these, when they stay in the apartment, just talking and playing video games. She has no trouble, because she's not pretending.

8. The way he knows what she likes without being told

Sure, it's kind of creepy, the way he notices things, but it's also sort of sweet. One time, Awesome was watching a football game with a few of his buddies in the living room. From her perch in the kitchen, she could see the scores of other games scrolling across the bottom of the screen. She could have sworn that Chuck caught her grimace as the Chicago Bears' score appeared. There was nothing in the agency's handbook about sports loyalties betraying personal information such as home state, but luckily he hasn't said anything. She's just glad it hadn't been baseball season.

The best apology she ever got was when he showed up at her apartment with olive-less pizza. She understands his frustration, understands why he wants to know more about her. Luckily, her allegiance to the agency still outweighs her faithfulness to him, though she's not sure how long that will last.


End file.
